was I an a-hole?

[JHbowhunter]

before you see who the OP is and just knee-jerk react "yes", I mean with this one situation in particular (not in general). So please read, because it's eating me up, and wondering what the hell I DID WRONG- I FEEL I WAS GREATLY WRONGED.

I been hunting a small piece that can be a real honey hole when conditions are right for longer than I can remember - at least 15 years.  It is also at the home of my parents. I have two stands there on opposite ends of property based on conditions. I also added a 3rd stand this year on my cousin's property, which touches my parents - shot my EAB doe there last Saturday. There were In fact a few live in this area and I shot me opener doe on it Saturday.      3 stands - all about the wind, and low impact, never pressure it. .  Turns out someone I know - am friends with and even let bear hunt my woods once (known him over 30 years and he is better friends with my brother) asked my mom if he could hunt there.  My mom told him that I hunt there in the past and have a stand there, not sure if I am hunting that exact spot this year. (She was confused because she knows I hung that new stand so in her mind I might not hunt my long time stand).   They told me the guy was interested in hunting there, so I called him immediately, and left a message that said "Hey  - I heard you were interested in hunting on my parent's property, just wanted to let you know I still hunt there and have a stand, PLEASE LET ME KNOW YOUR PLANS"....  (he never returned my call).  That was last Monday. 

Fast forward to yesterday - I go to inspect my stand and see a ladder stand 20 yards away in the woods, a mineral lick, and the leaves all raked up with a mini-food plot.   Ok  - I am trying to keep it together.   Imagine how you would feel?

So I text the guy  and say "is that your treestand 20 yards from mine" he replies "yes".    

 

I replied " I been hunting there for the last 15 years".   He replied "what's your point bro".

ok let that sink in...  Imagine my blood pressure....(did I say anything wrong to this point?)

I sat on it - how to reply?

I typed one word  "Ethics?" with a question mark. 

No reply. 

Then I added 10 minutes later "it's been my spot for the last 15 years - I wasn't aware I was giving it up?" 

To which he replied "I didn't know first of all and second you could have just called me and been decent about it. I don't' really need your comments on ethics. If I had an issue with you I'd man up n discuss it with you. I also planted over there and put in some minerals and asked your parents!!!"

Now keep in mind, he was told I hunt there, he has my number and I left him a message with "what are your plans?" to which he never returned.  So now he is acting like I am the dick here. 

He then added "I also didn't say or think you would or should give it up". 

My next replies "I left u a message. Tried to call you to let you know I still hunt there. And I am trying to be decent. This is pretty bizarre if u look at it from my side. That has been my honey hole for years. And my father even told you he didn't feel comfortable with you hunting there its too close to private property. He didn't think you were going to hang a stand. I tried calling u to avoid any conflict and u didn't call me back.  I have never had this sort of issue hunting private property in my life. This is what happens on STATE LAND"

He replies "I won't put that pressure on your parents I'll pull my stand out! You gonna pay me for the seed and mineral lick or should I clean that up too?"

I replied "No. This is bizarre. Look at it from my point. If you were hunting your parents property for years and someone you know came and hung a stand 20 yards from yours - how would you feel? Again - I tried calling you to avoid any issues.   I did nothing wrong here. Not even a little bit. And you know the kind of guy I am if you ever asked me to hunt my property of any of my stands I would have said yes but again I don't like to over-pressure my stands I only hunt when wind is right and I do like to have some control as to what is going on that is the whole point to hunting private property". 

He replied " Thanx for the lesson and no I don't know ya. I always thought more of you!!!!!  I'm not gonna cause your parents any grief I'll pull my stand out like I said.  Good luck n have fun!!!!!"

I replied with "I don't know what to say. I tried to call u. I had no idea u hung a stand there. I go there to check mine and see it. I text you and you wonder what my point is bro? Again what would u have done in my shoes? Someone hangs a stand 20 yards from yours?.  I figured u never called me back because you were not going to hunt there. What else would I think?. My voice message to you was 'I hunt there what are your plans?'. So again - I thought I was being decent"

No more replies...   This makes me sick.

The guy has been bow hunting as long as me - an killed some real slammers. I know there is a giant buck in the area everyone sees from the road, I am sure he saw it too.    This is what it comes down to for some - big buck at all costs!!!

Ok now please school me on what I did wrong here? 

Oh and my father is gravely ill.  It's not a good situation there - they don't need this drama.  My brother knows this, This guy knows it. The balls to even ask???

 

[LPJR]

Holy Sh%$. I am floored that someone you have known for 30+ years would do this. YOU are not in the wrong for your actions, thoughts, and feelings. I will call you in a few Jack, unreal. 

[A&N_Hunter]

I do not see anything wrong in what you did. I’d say you handled it better than most would On this site. It’s unfortunate that he needed to take advantage of a situation knowing you’re in there. Nothing would piss me off more than someone coming in and potentially f-ing up something I’ve been working really hard on.

correct me if I’m wrong, your post never specifically said Mom gave the OK. Trespassing?

 

bottom line, you pissed in his Cheerios while he was looking to screw you. I’d be more concerned with what happens on your property after he is gone. Sad. Pathetic. 

[BowhunterNJ]

If that's the guys actual quoted replies, he's a douche.  JMHO but the dude is on your parent's property and that's how he responds (or doesn't respond) to their son?  Your responses were very reasonable, guy just sounds like he enjoys confrontation or is trying to make you uncomfortable so maybe you abandon hunting there.  That's honestly bullshit even setting up by your stand...he clearly knew it was there, and did all the other work to do what exactly...say he put "effort" into the spot and angle you even more.  Looks pretty clear he's trying to make you seem like the bad guy.  I just can't imagine someone acting that was towards the son of the land owners, and especially someone they actually know.  "What's your point bro?"  Really? That would make my blood boil.  F him, get him out of there, and make it clear he's not welcome anywhere on your parents' or cousin's property.  There's also NO WAY I'm paying him for whatever he claims he did on the property.

[Gobblengrunt]

Wrong on so many levels!  He doesn’t think to much of your friendship that’s for sure.  It’s amazing deer ruin good relationships, probably why deer hunting and it’s participation and traditions are on a downhill slide.  I would take his stand down, tell him it’s family property and he is not welcome back, PERIOD!!  Give him an official warning of no trespassing because I would bet he would turn this into a shit show.  He is NOT a friend, hunter, or sportsman

[CJ3a]

I would never asked your parents if I knew or heard you hunted it.  I think the dick moves starts there. 

[Livesintrees]

Soooo what does before I tell you who the OP is mean? Either way I agree with you. I woulda removed the stand and left it in his driveway. But I don’t have patience for this type of thing so I think you handled it like a friggin saint. 

[Bonefreak]

OMG Jack!!!  That guy us a total dick wod!!!  You did nothing wrong!!!  He is a smacker for even asking your parents......my mom always said....blood us thicker than water.....meaning family us everything.....n that means family gets permission to hunt before friends. Thus guy shud hav never tried to hone in on your area.....but since he saw that big buck, he is pulling out all the tricks. Then....to have the audacity to make you feel bad about it, ask for money for his block, etc.....he really is asking for a knuckle sandwich!!!  

 

And the worst thing of it all, since your dad is ill....who needs this asshat drama!!!  Hope your dad feels better and tell this "friend" of your brothers to go eat a dick!!!

[JHbowhunter]

9 minutes ago, LPJR said:

Holy Sh%$. I am floored that someone you have known for 30+ years would do this. YOU are not in the wrong for your actions, thoughts, and feelings. I will call you in a few Jack, unreal. 

lou you know me.  can you imagine my inner "rage" when I get text "what's your point bro?"     Can you IMAGINE?

[MS22]

If he knows you, why would he go around you and ask your parents? Why would he not even mention it to you? Even if he barely knew you but knew you hunted. I’d feel super uncomfortable asking without going through you first

 

so weird. 

[SPEARFISH]

Hunting spots have ruined more than one friendship.   Hes a dick for putting his stand next to yours.  He should have called you if he knew you were hunting there instead of taking advantage of your parents. 

[JHbowhunter]

1 minute ago, Bonefreak said:

OMG Jack!!!  That guy us a total dick wod!!!  You did nothing wrong!!!  He is a smacker for even asking your parents......my mom always said....blood us thicker than water.....meaning family us everything.....n that means family gets permission to hunt before friends. Thus guy shud hav never tried to hone in on your area.....but since he saw that big buck, he is pulling out all the tricks. Then....to have the audacity to make you feel bad about it, ask for money for his block, etc.....he really is asking for a knuckle sandwich!!!  

 

And the worst thing of it all, since your dad is ill....who needs this asshat drama!!!  Hope your dad feels better and tell this "friend" of your brothers to go eat a dick!!!

I told my dad I am going to effing kill him..  I mean I won't, I am not a homicidal maniac, but to actually put this back on me when I feel I took the high road and did nothing wrong?

[Livesintrees]

I like the part where he said he put effort in it. So he hung a stand, dumped some mineral and raked a postage stamp area of leaves. My god he must be beat. 

[CJ3a]

I would also be having a talk with my brother. 

[JHbowhunter]

6 minutes ago, Gobblengrunt said:

Wrong on so many levels!  He doesn’t think to much of your friendship that’s for sure.  It’s amazing deer ruin good relationships, probably why deer hunting and it’s participation and traditions are on a downhill slide.  I would take his stand down, tell him it’s family property and he is not welcome back, PERIOD!!  Give him an official warning of no trespassing because I would bet he would turn this into a shit show.  He is NOT a friend, hunter, or sportsman

He is like my brother's best friend.